Vegan hot dog cart. On bike. Fainting. Jumping. I know. I know. I know that I always seem excited about vegan stuff in Seattle, but this time, I REALLY AM LOSING MY MIND. When I found Cycle Dogs on twitter, I was like “are you frucking with me? Are there hidden camera bots on me in my back yard waiting for me to jump up and down crying with joy. Where is the person who is going come out and be like ‘PSYCH NO VEGAN HOT DOGS FOR YOU.?” But there were no cameras. I think this could be real. THIS IS NOT A DREAM. An all vegan hot dog cart transported by bike could be in Seattle’s very near future. I’m not messing with you. No, this isn’t Portland. Stop saying that. Now watch this video. Watch! Pretty and informative.
Yes, did you watch that video? All vegan. Party catering? YES. Every party from here on out. I want to eat vegan hot dogs with all the fixens and flavors and fun ingredients. I want to stumble out of bar sometime and right into a vegan hot dog cart and order one of the hot dogs below. I MEAN REALLY? It’s Breakfast Time Somewhere? I want that! Also, this guy is using local and organic ingredients like Field Roast. Also, there will be gluten-free dogs (yay Lulu!), and all the waste will be composted, making me and other tree huggers so happy.
OK, not that you need to know this, but here are three ways that vegan hot dogs RULE over animal-filled hot dogs. You are welcome to share this with your friends:
- Vegan hot dogs can be enjoyed by everyone: Most of the population can eat them (lest ye be allergic to gluten and soy). This is the thing about all vegan food – it is very delicious and nutritious for animals eaters too. Animal-filled dogs? Not so much.
- Vegan hot dogs aren’t made with dead animals: Now this might not matter to every person, but it matter to every animal that gets put into hot dogs. So even if you like eating dead animals, you shouldn’t do it because they don’t like it. This makes vegan dogs better.
- Animal-filled hot dogs are filled with other bad things: sodium nitrate (in higher doses, used as rat poison); gobs of saturated fat (up to 30% is allowed); and “fillers” that don’t have to be labeled. Field Roast frankfurters are filled with things like: wheat, oil,
barley malt, yeast, tomato, apple cider vinegar, paprika, sea salt, onions, garlic, natural liquid smoke, caraway, celery seed,
ground yellow mustard, and such.
OK, now read this menu again and tell me to calm down. You can’t do it.
Before we begin dreaming up all the ways we’ll customize our dogs when we see Cycle Dogs around, we’ll first have to support this endeavor with a little of our spare change. What do you have in that jar? Let it go to the dogs! Do it.